So I'm halfway through the 2ww..doing pretty well for the most part. WAY less on the imaginary symptoms than last time. Or is the lack of symptoms a symptom? Gonna need to goo.gle that! I seem to be a bit weepy..which is a little strange. I actually got choked up in the christmas aisle at tar.get today. The trigger: a cute little owl ornament. Normally my hormones swing towards rage..like a few weeks ago when I flipped off a crying baby in red lobster. I'm not proud of it but i guess the mom didn't see so it was ok. Maybe she did but seriously her kid was kind of being an a-hole. Last month I had a pretty definate feel that it was a BFN pretty early on. This time..I really don't know. I am more hopeful, Husband is SUPER excited. I know he'll take it much harder than I will if this isn't our month. It kinda feels like it could be though. I almost don't know how to process it all, I think I'm more prepared for a negative. Its familiar territory at least. I'm going to be good and not test until the 9th though. My dr has me set up for a blood test on the 10th but its an hour drive there and I have to leave at 6 am. I figure if I test on the 9th and its negative I can save my time and gas and if it even looks like a sorta kinda line I'll go for the beta.
Also I was giving a coworker a ride yesterday and the song Siren by Tori Amos came on and I burst into tears..awkward! When I saw her in concert she played it and I SOBBED the whole time. She also struggled with miscarriages and infertility and a lot of that comes though in her songs (From the Choir Girl Hotel is about her multiple losses..and a damn good album). That song gets me every time!
Siren
and you know you’re
gonna lie to you
in your own way
know know too well
know the chill
know she breaks
my siren
NEVER was one
for a
prissy girl
coquette
call in for
an ambulance
reach high
doesn't
mean SHE’S
holy
just means
she’s got a cellular
handy
almost
brave
almost
pregnant
almost in love “VANILLA”
and you know you’re
gonna lie to you
in your own way
and you don’t need the light
to guide you though this
3 comments:
Hope is such a fabulous feeling. I hate that you're prone to ransom crying spurts, but it beats flipping off toddlers (which is really, really funny, btw!). I hope the next week flies by and 11/9 leaves you with a strong BFP!
Here's to being halfway through the 2ww! Fingers and everything else still crossed for you. :)
Such a beautiful song... my heart is with you for your 2WW. Hope this is your month and that your get your BFP on the 9th. Symptoms are so so hard to interpret... hopefully the emotions are a positive sign. Love always xoxo
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