Showing posts with label Donor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Donor. Show all posts
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
I just have to say...
Since the start of our journey as Infertiles, I have been seriously unimpressed by the lack of information out there about Male Factor Infertility and Donor Sperm. There is a ton of information about using donor sperm but it is all aimed at same sex couples. If it is mentioned there may be only a few sentences devoted to the subject and 45 pages on using a donor egg. For the life me I cannot figure out why using donor sperm is treated as something thats almost dirty and forbidden, like its a secret problem. But using a donor egg is a beautiful, powerful step to take. WTF? I think it comes down to sperm isn't cute. It requires masterbation and probably some copies of Hustler. Donating eggs can be a painful process but both donated egg and sperm do the same thing: They help couples acheive what they desire most aboue all else, a baby. I just wish there wasn't such a wall around the subject. There is an RE in our town that comes so highly reccommended. We went to see him and told him that there is a chance we might use a known donor. He told us flat out he wouldn't use a known donor. ButI bet if my cousin or want wanted to donoate her eggs to me it wouldn't be an issue. Needless to say we won't be using that doctor, even if we have to travel outside of our area. I don't need small minds around me. This is hard enough as it is without some guys opinion. There are a few good books out there, Helping The Stork has been a lifesaver but its one book out of thousands. I could go on for days on the subject, it just really chaps my ass.
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
All About Me!
My name is Amy, I'm so close to 30 I could lick it. I live in Florida with my husband and our sweet baby dog, Roxie. I have a job I hate but I keep plugging away at it everyday anyway. If I had the body to strip I probably would. I read A LOT, usually a book a day and I enjoy grape juice and doritos. I think I'm stunningly average and I'm sure the dog agrees with me, she has killer instincts.
I'm an only child, my parents have taken the sport of remarriage to olympic levels and never had another biological child. I was adopted by my 1st stepfather who promptly turned out to be an asshat ( this is THE nicest thing can say about him) which saddled me with a truly awful last name which allowed me to be made fun of all though school. Thanks mom! To make matters worse they were divorced by the time I was 13, my good fortune would continue for several years. I'm closest to my Grandparents, I love them to bits. I met my husband in high school but we didn't date or anything, we were very diffrent. He played D&D and I was So Goth I Was Dead. A few years after high school we met up again ( ok, ok, on the internet!). We had our first date August 31, 2001 and got married September 6, 2002. It all happened pretty fast for us we were actually engaged by Christmas 2001. We've been married for almost 6 years now. He is in the military and so far we have lived in Georgia and Florida.
We pretty much started trying for a baby right away. Thats what military people do. They get married young and have lots of kids. We felt confident it could happen to us too. We didn't try really hardcore, like with OPKs and temping but we figured just keep plugging away and it'll happen. If it takes a few months thats ok, we really weren't in a rush. We moved from Georgia to Florida, had a few deployments, some hurricane evacuations, so obviously there were some times where we didn't or couldn't try. I'd get a little down sometimes but I figured all in good time. We had only been married 3 years, we enjoyed our time together, not worried about not being pregnant yet. There is another factor to this story though. I had steaily over the years been gaining weight. I had major thyroid problems and medication wasn't helping. I developed Diabetes. And Gout. And High Blood Pressure. I was on 8 medications a day. I was in no shape to be having a baby really. So I made the choice to have Gastric Bypass. As soon as i made this choice we stopped trying for a baby. It took almost a year from the time I decided to have the surgery to the day they wheeled me into the operating room. It was the best choice I ever made. I have lost 90 pounds so far and I fell great and normal!
You have to wait a year to 18 months after surgery to start having babies. I waited and then we went at it with gusto! Fertility rates sky rocket after surgery since your body is so much healthier. Still no baby. One day on the off hand chance I suggested that my husband go get tested, its free so why not? The problem was all mine anyway, what with being overweight and having health problems. The husband is healthy as a horse! Except his semen anylsis came back no sperm found. So did the next one and the 6 tests after that. We were floored. He went through all kinds of tests, had to show his weiner to so many people and be fondled by unattractive nurses. We had his chromosomes checked, blood tested, ultrasounds, xrays the whole 9 yards. But it all came back the same. If he was producing sperm it wasn't coming out and they didn't know why. They didn't even know if was producing sperm at all.
So thats where we are now. Its been almost a year since we got the diagnosis of Azoospermia. We decided to use donor sperm becuase they said surgery wouldn't help they didn't expect to find anything. Then they back tracked and said no we could find sperm we just have to dig for it. We were going to use an unkown donor until someone in his family said they wanted to be the donor. This is still an issue that is up in the air. We're giving this person time to think his choice through. We're going to be doing IVF/ICSI. Now its just a matter of saving the money and figuring out the donor. ( We have a list of unkown donors should the known donor decide not to do it. Which I will totally understand. We lived for months with the idea of an unkown donor before the known donor offered, its not too much of stretch to go back to an unkown.)
I'm an only child, my parents have taken the sport of remarriage to olympic levels and never had another biological child. I was adopted by my 1st stepfather who promptly turned out to be an asshat ( this is THE nicest thing can say about him) which saddled me with a truly awful last name which allowed me to be made fun of all though school. Thanks mom! To make matters worse they were divorced by the time I was 13, my good fortune would continue for several years. I'm closest to my Grandparents, I love them to bits. I met my husband in high school but we didn't date or anything, we were very diffrent. He played D&D and I was So Goth I Was Dead. A few years after high school we met up again ( ok, ok, on the internet!). We had our first date August 31, 2001 and got married September 6, 2002. It all happened pretty fast for us we were actually engaged by Christmas 2001. We've been married for almost 6 years now. He is in the military and so far we have lived in Georgia and Florida.
We pretty much started trying for a baby right away. Thats what military people do. They get married young and have lots of kids. We felt confident it could happen to us too. We didn't try really hardcore, like with OPKs and temping but we figured just keep plugging away and it'll happen. If it takes a few months thats ok, we really weren't in a rush. We moved from Georgia to Florida, had a few deployments, some hurricane evacuations, so obviously there were some times where we didn't or couldn't try. I'd get a little down sometimes but I figured all in good time. We had only been married 3 years, we enjoyed our time together, not worried about not being pregnant yet. There is another factor to this story though. I had steaily over the years been gaining weight. I had major thyroid problems and medication wasn't helping. I developed Diabetes. And Gout. And High Blood Pressure. I was on 8 medications a day. I was in no shape to be having a baby really. So I made the choice to have Gastric Bypass. As soon as i made this choice we stopped trying for a baby. It took almost a year from the time I decided to have the surgery to the day they wheeled me into the operating room. It was the best choice I ever made. I have lost 90 pounds so far and I fell great and normal!
You have to wait a year to 18 months after surgery to start having babies. I waited and then we went at it with gusto! Fertility rates sky rocket after surgery since your body is so much healthier. Still no baby. One day on the off hand chance I suggested that my husband go get tested, its free so why not? The problem was all mine anyway, what with being overweight and having health problems. The husband is healthy as a horse! Except his semen anylsis came back no sperm found. So did the next one and the 6 tests after that. We were floored. He went through all kinds of tests, had to show his weiner to so many people and be fondled by unattractive nurses. We had his chromosomes checked, blood tested, ultrasounds, xrays the whole 9 yards. But it all came back the same. If he was producing sperm it wasn't coming out and they didn't know why. They didn't even know if was producing sperm at all.
So thats where we are now. Its been almost a year since we got the diagnosis of Azoospermia. We decided to use donor sperm becuase they said surgery wouldn't help they didn't expect to find anything. Then they back tracked and said no we could find sperm we just have to dig for it. We were going to use an unkown donor until someone in his family said they wanted to be the donor. This is still an issue that is up in the air. We're giving this person time to think his choice through. We're going to be doing IVF/ICSI. Now its just a matter of saving the money and figuring out the donor. ( We have a list of unkown donors should the known donor decide not to do it. Which I will totally understand. We lived for months with the idea of an unkown donor before the known donor offered, its not too much of stretch to go back to an unkown.)
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